


Chemistry

by GuineapigQueen



Series: 200 Followers Requests [5]
Category: South Park
Genre: F/M, mostly just clyde is a big dork for bebe, tweek is only mentioned
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-16
Updated: 2019-06-16
Packaged: 2020-03-07 20:43:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,552
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18880888
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GuineapigQueen/pseuds/GuineapigQueen
Summary: Fill for this prompt: Clyde is partnered with Bebe in science class and he's desperate to impress her with cool chemical shit. Think secret messages that show up with iodine and things in Bunsen burners. Extra points of most of them go horribly wrong!





	Chemistry

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks to metrophobic for the beta! It's always fun to write some good old Clybe :)  
> Also thanks to Blame Canada for helping me with the science stuff, I'm hopeless and have no idea how science works.

She’s perfect, a goddess, beyond human and Clyde can barely comprehend it. She’s nothing like the other girls he’s crushed on before. Normally he thinks he’s pretty good with the ladies. He’s got pick up lines, and jokes Jimmy has given him, and he knows he’s pretty sexy. He thinks he’s a pretty nice guy: he shows his feelings and he always tries to love and cherish who ever he’s dating. He thinks he’s a pretty good catch. But man, when he’s around Bebe? He just loses all confidence, clever pick up lines dying in his throat as he’s silenced by her sheer beauty. 

 

He’s never been afraid to talk to girls he’s crushed on before. He just doesn’t know what to do. 

 

He’s ecstatic when they’re paired together as lab partners, even if he barely has the courage to say a word to her in each lesson. He tries, tries to laugh at all her jokes and give her one word responses at least. But she carries all their conversations, he just can’t get it together. 

 

Another thing about Bebe: she’s smart. Way smarter than Clyde; she’s smarter than anyone gives her credit for. Maybe that’s because she hides behind the popular, pretty blonde image she has at school, but Clyde has noticed. Even though he’s an absolute dead weight of a lab partner she doesn’t seem to mind explaining things or taking the lead in their projects. Which is why their experiment has mostly been spearheaded by her - she knows what she’s doing. 

 

More than anything Clyde wants to ask her out, but somehow, even if he managed to find a way to get the words out it wouldn’t be good enough. No, it needs to be grand, exciting, special - just like Bebe is. Clyde is honestly stumped. He’s normally not bad at romantic things, but buying flowers and telling her she’s hot seems too cheap for Bebe. Clyde wants to show her that she’s the  _ one,  _ the most perfect human being he’s ever seen. 

 

So he asks the least romantic person he knows (but has somehow managed to be in a successful relationship longer than anyone else at this school) - Craig. 

 

He asks Craig because Craig is smart, like Bebe. Craig likes science. He reads about it in his spare time, and more importantly, he’s good at it. If Clyde’s gonna do a cool science thing for Bebe, it’s gotta be correct. He doesn’t wanna get things wrong in front of her and embarrass himself further. So he consults Craig, his best science man. 

 

And Craig, being the nerd he is, delivers. 

 

—

 

“Are you sure this’ll work, dude?” Clyde says to Craig, fully aware that if this goes wrong he’ll have messed up all of his and Bebe’s hard work on their experiment. 

 

“Yes, I’m sure,” Craig grumbles. “I did something similar for Tweek once.”

 

“Oh, so you’re reusing your ideas. Thanks bro.”

 

“No I’m not, the thing I did for Tweek was different, ok? Do you want my help or not?”

 

“Yes!” Clyde says, panicking a little. Craig is the sort of person who will follow through with his threats. 

 

“Come on then,” Craig gripes. “Jimmy’s jokes aren’t gonna distract Bebe forever.”

 

Clyde sighs, watching Bebe and the other girls giggle and fawn over Jimmy. Damn, why can’t he have game like that?

 

—

 

Clyde can barely keep still, his nerves are running so high. Today is the day that his message should begin to show. He made it so that the Petri dishes containing their experiment would spell out the word “date?” He doesn’t really know how it all works, something to do with bacteria? Craig said it would take a few weeks before he’d be able to see the reaction, so he knows it’ll be any day now. He has a feeling about today. 

 

“You’re quiet today,” Bebe observes. “Something on your mind?”

 

“Uh, no,” Clyde squeaks out nervously.

 

“Well, are you excited to check on our experiment?” she asks him. “I really wanna see our results.”

 

“Yeah,” Clyde says, following her dumbly. 

 

Craig, Jimmy, Tweek and Token all watch them go, giving Clyde various thumbs up and smiles. 

 

“It’s been fun working with you, Clyde,” says Bebe. “Maybe we could be lab partners again - next time?”

 

“Yeah.” Clyde nods furiously. “You’re so smart… it’s awesome.”

 

“Aww, that’s sweet, Clyde,” she replies with a small smile. “It’s been really fun.”

 

Clyde didn’t realise she’d also been having fun, he thought he’d kinda been a brick wall to her. He feels his cheeks blush at Bebe’s positive words, and hangs back behind her like an idiot while she fetches their Petri dishes.

 

“Shit!” she exclaims, bringing them over to their workbench. “Clyde! Someone’s fucked with our experiment!”

 

“What? No!” he says, trying to calm her. “No, read what it says…”

 

She looks down, confused. Her face isn’t changing into an impressed facial expression… this is the part of the plan where she’s supposed to be impressed. She’s supposed to be swept off her feet by both Clyde’s science know-how and his sense of romance. Why isn’t she kissing him? Or at the very least, saying yes to a date? 

 

“ _ Date? _ Who did this? Was it you?”

 

“Well…” Clyde’s stomach drops. “Yeah, I did… for you?”

 

“Clyde?! You tampered with our experiment, that’s not cool! We both put so much effort into it! I was sure we’d get A’s! Why the fuck would you do that?” Bebe fumes. This isn’t the reaction Clyde wanted. He thought it would be cute and romantic. He hadn’t meant to make things worse, fuck. He’d blown everything with the most beautiful, perfect goddess he’d ever known. 

 

“Uh, I just…” He wrings his hands. “I just, I really like you… and I just wanted to ask you out in a creative way… I thought it was… romantic?”

 

“Oh my god!” Bebe gasps. “You did this for a  _ date?  _ You fucked with our work for  _ a date?  _ God, I thought you were different. Boys are all the same!” she exclaims before turning on her heel and storming out. Right out of class, so upset she doesn’t seem to care about the consequences. 

 

Clyde is left staring at his tampered-with Petri dishes, avoiding the shocked gazes of his classmates and trying not to cry. 

 

— 

 

Bebe hasn’t spoken to him since the incident. Granted, Clyde hasn’t tried. He doesn’t want to upset her further and well, he’s a little intimidated by her. He’s been a pathetic shell of a person since her rejection - mainly dragging his feet and sighing dramatically. Sometimes crying if the right buttons are pushed. The guys just don’t understand, she was  _ the one -  _ he’s sure. 

 

It doesn’t help that Tweek and Craig are so sappy together, and Token and Nichole are so cute. Jimmy is single, but he likes it that way - he’s never known anyone to be as good with the ladies as Jimmy. So even if Jimmy is single, he’s still got  _ someone  _ if you know what he means. Clyde is painfully forever alone, doomed to live with ten cats and cry his lonely self to sleep every night. Nobody understands that he’s nothing without her. 

 

He goes to the library at lunch so that he can sit alone. He can’t stand another lunch watching Tweek and Craig make heart eyes at one another. He needs to be alone and wallow in his sorrows. He’s kinda surprised when another person slides in opposite him at the table. He’s about to tell them to go away, and that he’s not in the mood to chat when he sees it’s Bebe. 

 

“Hey,” she says softly. Clyde tries not to let his jaw drop. 

 

“Uh, hi,” he squeaks.

 

“Look, um, I’m sorry I yelled like that in front of everyone…” she says, fidgeting a little nervously. “I mean, I’m still kinda pissed you wrecked our experiment but I can see that you were coming from a place of caring.” 

 

“Yeah, I thought maybe because you like science so much that if I asked you out using something you like, it would mean more,” Clyde explains. “I see why you’re mad though. I guess I just got caught up in the idea of being romantic.”

 

“I mean, once I calmed down and I talked to the girls, it was kinda… cute? In its own way. It’s cute that you put so much thought into it, anyway.” Bebe smiles. “I do like you, Clyde. I’ve liked you the whole time we’ve been lab partners, you just… whenever I talk, you just say ‘yeah’ or ‘uh-huh’ so I figured you weren’t interested.”

 

“I am!” exclaims Clyde. “I am! I’m  _ so  _ interested! Shit Bebe, you’re just so pretty that like, I can’t talk sometimes… I got so nervous.”

 

“Nervous,” she repeats. “Wow, I thought you just didn’t like me.”

 

“No way,” Clyde assures. “I like you,  _ so  _ much. I just didn’t know how to say it.”

 

“Well…” Bebe says, clearly thinking hard about what to say next. “In that case… yes.”

 

“Yes?”

 

“Yes, I’ll go on a date with you! But! Next time, maybe don’t use bacteria to confess your love for me?” she says with a wink.

 

Clyde nearly falls off his chair. 

 

“Okay, deal,” he says once he’s finally found his voice. “No more bacteria messages.” 

**Author's Note:**

> My tumblr is blesspastacraig if you wanna be friends :)


End file.
